Comforts

It’s been just about a week since we got the call from our parents about our cousin’s passing. The last week has been heavy, hard, and deeply sad. Our parents had the opportunity to drive down to Rochester, MN, and spend time with the rest of the family. We had uncles and aunts fly in from India. The support and togetherness must have helped – as much as it could.

K and I had a tough time coping on our own. We weren’t surrounded by family. We couldn’t even be together. But I know K got some amazing support on her end (thanks for that), and besides my fiancé, who I’m convinced is the best comfort-er, having a little puppy to snuggle with and keep my heart warm didn’t hurt.

Fiancé and I have had Kingston for just about 10 days now. He is a handful (I can’t say I wasn’t warned), but he’s getting better. Once he stops chewing my amazing coffee table, and ripping apart my beautiful bamboo footstool, I’m sure I’ll think he’s a perfect angel. For now, though, he’s just like a baby. Can’t control his bladder, getting into mischief, making himself at home, and really owning the role as his human parent’s boss. He’s finally sleeping through the night (rejoice!), but gets so lonely during the work day. We have an amazing dog walker that comes and plays with him during the day – he can’t go outside for another month until he gets his shots – and is working on training him a bit.

The best thing about Kingston, though, is he is so incredibly loving. Already. He loves to snuggle, it makes his day when we pick him up and hold him, and he’s really trying to be a good boy – for the most part. And the emotional support he gives – not even kidding – is wonderful and kind of mind-boggling. Here are some pictures of our first pit stop together 🙂

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The Gautam and Pai sisters are all coming to town this weekend, so Kingston will finally get to meet some of his aunts (still eagerly waiting to meet his M Aunt and A Aunt), and his baby cousins. We’re hoping he’s on his best (and cutest) behavior.

Look forward to sharing everything we do this weekend when we’re all together. Looking forward to some quality family time.

Hugs & love, A

The Importance of “I Love You”

I was never the type of person to constantly distribute “I love you’s.” I always took love very very seriously. Reserving it for moments when I was overwhelmed with emotion, and for people who I knew, without a single doubt in my mind, that I loved.

But over the past few years, I’ve noticed myself using it a lot more often. I don’t know what shifted in me, but suddenly I say it every time I hang up the phone with my family (we weren’t always the mushy type), I say it to my fiancé throughout the day (and now to our puppy, too!), I sign off text message exchanges by saying it to my close friends.
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Because why not? Why not let people know you love them? Of course love comes in varying degrees, and there may be moments when the people you love don’t deserve your love. But it’s always always better to over-say it (not to the boy you met 48 hours ago – unless it’s really truly that epic – but you know what I mean). It’s always better for people to know that someone loves them. You never know with life.
This week, we lost a member of our family. And as I was reminiscing about all of the times we had spent together, I realized that I had never told him I loved him. How could I not have told him that? He was part of my family. And family is built squarely on love. How could it be that we had hardly spoken in the last year? Was I really that busy that I couldn’t pick up the phone? Or at the least shoot him a text, email, Facebook message?
People often say that you’ve got to have something taken away in order to understand how much it meant to you. But I say eff that philosophy. Relish what you have all the damn time. Think about it, appreciate it, and say it, for God’s sake.
Love you all,
A

Opportunity Cost

Something that I’ve been experiencing on the daily are harsh adult realities. I often tell people that I don’t feel like my charmed, happy childhood prepared me enough for the reality of the real world. But, hey, I guess that’s life – right?

One of the realities I’ve because all too well acquainted with is that of opportunity costs.

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No matter what you’re doing or where you’re going, you are giving something up. No matter how hard you try, you can’t have everything and do everything.

This idea actually comes up in my favorite Bollywood movie (whatever, haters goin’ hate) but I didn’t really realize what a poetically true concept it was until last night when I couldn’t sleep (typical). There’s a scene where the two main characters are spending time together after years- they’re exploring Udaipur and sight-seeing together. The male lead is a travel fanatic and a soon-to-be travel show host, while the female lead is a practicing doctor in India. After a day of traveling they’re sitting on the ledge of some ancient, gorgeous fort, watching the sunset. He tries to convince her to get up otherwise they’ll miss whatever is next on their to-see list (I think it’s a firework show). She responds by throwing the list in the air and stating that no matter what you do in life, you’re going to miss out on something, because no one can do everything.

If you choose to go home during Spring Break to see your family, you will miss out on an epic party or vacation. But, if you go on vacation, you’re missing spending what could be your last break ever with your family. If you choose to skip class to chill, you may miss out on an in-class activity worth five points (yes, I’m still salty about this) But if you go to class…that’s two and a half hours of your life wasted (the truth about some college courses). If you decide to stay in one night and catch up on sleep, you will miss out on making lasting memories with your friends, but if you go, you may be miserably tired and fall asleep anyways.

The truth about life is that we’re always giving up one thing to gain another.

Choose wisely.

Love,

K

Gautam Girl Reunion

Hi!

Once again, I’m swamped with exams, work, interviews, volunteering, and every other thing under the sun. And despite my pretty blah Spring Break (that I already vented to you guys about), there was one (literally, just one…well aside from the obvious seeing my parents, eating my mom’s food, and rolling around with my doggy) silver lining.

A few weeks before break I decided that I wanted to do something special for all of the Gautam Girls (so, on the Gautam side of the family there are no boys. There’s me and A, and then our cousins S, M, and…we’ll call her N since A is already taken and we never call her by her name anyways). We are rarely all together these days so every time we are, I think it deserves to be celebrated.

With the wedding quickly approaching, I realized that this would be one of the last times all of us are truly “Gautam Girls.” So I started thinking what I could do for all of us that would be cute and worthy of a photoshoot (because what girl doesn’t love a photoshoot). So, here’s what I did…

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Excuse the excessive faces. N gave us all a lesson on “the werk face.” It’s kind of sad when you’re the lame older cousin who doesn’t know things.

But honestly, there’s no time like Gautam Girl time. And I’m so excited to rep the Gautam’s no matter where I am with these bomb beanies.

Happy Tuesday, guys.

Love,

K

Spring Break 2014

SB2014 – rage time!

But actually…

As a 22-year-old and a second semester senior in college, you’d think Spring Break means a trip to somewhere warm, a lot of half-naked (I actually feel like they’re usually three-fourths naked…) people, too much booze, and little-to-no (or negative) responsibility.

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Instead, my last break ever had been dulled by adulthood. I have been looking forward to Spring Break for at least a month now. Coming home is always my favorite. Lazing around with my doggy, chit chatting with my rents, and eating home-cooked food is the best. I didn’t even mind that I hadn’t planned a vacation with any of my friends because to me, nothing is better than some good ol’ time at home. I really need this down time after a super stressful month. I was so excited about it that I even made a Facebook status about it. You know shit is a big deal when I make a Facebook status about it.

I was expecting the perfect balance of adventure and relaxation. Instead? Instead I got days of stress over upcoming exams, job searching, wedding planning (not that I don’t love to do it and help out A, but wedding planning is not relaxing, nor is it as glamours as JLo makes it look), and even trying to find the perfect workout schedule (if you know me you know how much this must truly…suck…for lack of a better word).

My conclusion? Adulthood is a place with no breaks. Downtime is rare. And even when you have it, it, all too often, is disrupted. Obligations and responsibilities can only be put on the back burner for a short period of time. And that…for a lack of a better word (again)…sucks.

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Take me back to my childhood! 😦

Love,

K

The Doggy Diaries – Part II

If you haven’t already caught wind of the news (mostly from me babbling on and on and on about it), our puppy is finally confirmed!

In my last post, I shared a bit on the adoption process. How I went a little crazy over this adorable puppy (without even talking to Fiancé…), and decided that I just needed him. Of course, that didn’t end up working out. The pup was in Ohio, we couldn’t get much information on his health, where he came from, etc., and he needed to be picked up in 24-hours. For us Manhattan-ites, figuring out a car situation and driving eighteen hours on a few hours notice is tough. And since Fiancé just wasn’t 100% sold, we couldn’t go through with it. It would have been his puppy too, after all!

Over the next few days, we kept our eyes on all of the adoption sites: BARC, Badass Brooklyn Animal Rescue, Petfinder (with a more local filter this time!), even Craigslist (per a recommendation from my dog-loving friend, Cio <3). But with my slight dog allergy, & NYC-sized apartment space, we just couldn’t find a doggy that fit the bill. And the last thing we wanted was to get a dog we wouldn’t be able to care for properly.

So, we started investigating breeders. There are a lot of weird ones out there, so it’s important to be very very careful and do a lot of research. I realized that testimonials (real ones) are key. The breeder we found had a huge Facebook presence with hundreds of customers posting pictures of their dogs (even 12-year old dogs which they had gotten from her back in the day!), and singing her praises. She had a bunch of mixed breed honeys, and as soon as Fiancé saw some of the pictures she sent us, he totally fell in love.

I’ve been speaking to the breeder at length since then – seriously bless her for putting up with my incessant questions! She stayed on the phone with me for an hour the night we decided to finalize, telling me all about him and his parents, filling me in on what we’d need, etc. It was the most wonderful, stress-free, comforting process.

SO, in two weeks, our little guy KINGSTON is going to arrive. And we CAN’T WAIT.

I don’t have any pictures of him to share yet, but rest assured that when we do start posting pictures, it’ll never stop. Consider this your preemptive puppy picture hiatus.

Can’t wait to get started on all the cute puppy shopping! My Mom’s already started – she got him the bowls below 🙂

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Hope everyone’s week is off to a great start.

Love,

A

PS – Any puppy advice would be much appreciated, so send it our way!

Quote Of The Day

Hey guys,

I know it’s been a while since I last posted, I was bombarded with all my exams in the span of one week, of course. But now, I’m lucky enough to be writing this from my parents’ couch (that I talk about all the time because yes, it is that awesome), with my pup at my feet, and on my dad’s MacBook Air. Clearly, living the life. You can expect more Cleveland adventures (some actual adventures, some just me sitting in this very spot and ranting on about things) in the next 10 days. Especially since A, along with all my cousins, will be joining me shortly.

But until then, I wanted to share this quote with you guys. As my friends and I wrap up our final year of college (I actually feel a pang every time I say that), we ponder the concept of growing up more and more. We tell ourselves to live it up now, because in just two months we will have to be fully matured adults. But…will we? I think we put so much emphasis on growing up these days that we forget that it’s actually an endless process. You’re never really done growing up. Anais Nin nailed it:

“ We do not grow absolutely, chronologically. We grow sometimes in one dimension, and not in another; unevenly. We grow partially. We are relative. We are mature in one realm, childish in another. The past, present, and future mingle and pull us backward, forward, or fix us in the present. We are made up of layers, cells, constellations. ”

So in the next few weeks, let’s not pressure ourselves to be adults, or act childish for the last time. Let’s just let our past, present, and future act on us as they wish. 

Just some food for thought.

Hope you all have a great week!

Love,

K